Five months on the road and publishing nonbinary stories. When I reflect on my year, I’m amazed by all the experiences I had and also stressed by all the things I could do better. Yes, I have imposter syndrome. Most of us do, I think.
Oh Rey, I so feel you on all of this. The world is not an easy place for us nonbinary folks, and it can be so hard (for me at least) to feel like I am safe being myself in almost any situation. If I dress too femme, people assume I'm not nonbinary. If I don't dress femme enough, the world doesn't treat me as nicely. I think you are doing just great— don't beat yourself up over the piece you pitched. The editor clearly saw something in it, and I think as writers all of us have to learn the lesson of taking a clear stance, which risks angering or excluding folks who may not agree with us. I hope you work on that pitch and try again.
This new year I'm grateful for you and the way you write about yourself and the world. I hope you have a wonderful new year. <3
Aww, thank you so much, Anastasia, for your support and encouragement! I agree, it's so hard to feel safe being myself. I appreciate the encouragement to try the pitch/piece again. I do think the editor saw something in it although not for that publication. Perhaps I can make it better with the perspective I have now.
I am grateful to have met you and thankful for your wisdom that you share!
That temptation to find safety by appearing "moderate" and "balanced" is one that I know all too well. Thank you for your honesty in describing this experience and naming it for what it is. All this helps us embolden one another.
Haha it helps that some of the mushrooms we forage are pretty big. A big hen of the woods (maitake) can be 10 pounds on its own (the biggest one we ever found was 22 pounds, we weighed it!)
Your honesty and openness is such a powerful gift to the world! We're all on a continual journey of growth, and of learning about ourselves and the world, it's just so many people are unwilling to accept that and want to think they've reached perfection. That's obviously nonsense, and what would be the point of life if we had it all figured out?! Your desire to keep learning and growing is very precious and it will take you to beautiful places. And if my words have helped in any small way to inspire you to keep sharing your story with the world, then I feel very honoured indeed. ❤️
Sounds like you've had some amazing growth this year, which is to say it's not always painless. But it's still valuable.
Write without regret. Write the wrong thing. Write mistakes loudly. Write, knowing you may have to apologize later anyway. But please keep writing. It's about the journey, not the destination.
That's a great way to reframe it, to know I may need to apologize later but I need to write it anyway. It wouldn't be learning if I wasn't making mistakes.
Oh Rey, I so feel you on all of this. The world is not an easy place for us nonbinary folks, and it can be so hard (for me at least) to feel like I am safe being myself in almost any situation. If I dress too femme, people assume I'm not nonbinary. If I don't dress femme enough, the world doesn't treat me as nicely. I think you are doing just great— don't beat yourself up over the piece you pitched. The editor clearly saw something in it, and I think as writers all of us have to learn the lesson of taking a clear stance, which risks angering or excluding folks who may not agree with us. I hope you work on that pitch and try again.
This new year I'm grateful for you and the way you write about yourself and the world. I hope you have a wonderful new year. <3
Aww, thank you so much, Anastasia, for your support and encouragement! I agree, it's so hard to feel safe being myself. I appreciate the encouragement to try the pitch/piece again. I do think the editor saw something in it although not for that publication. Perhaps I can make it better with the perspective I have now.
I am grateful to have met you and thankful for your wisdom that you share!
thank you for writing so bravely and openly. I feel you on wanting acceptance and approval <3
Thank you for reading. I'm glad this resonates with you.
That temptation to find safety by appearing "moderate" and "balanced" is one that I know all too well. Thank you for your honesty in describing this experience and naming it for what it is. All this helps us embolden one another.
Thanks for sharing that, Jae. It helps me feel less alone to hear similar experiences from others.
Darrell & I wish you a happy and healthy 2024.
Have wonderful adventures where ever you roam, and if you happen to come to NJ we would love for you to visit us.
Thank you so much, Haya! I hope you have a wonderful 2024. It's great to hear from you.
Not sure what my travel plans are at the moment but I appreciate the invitation a lot, thank you!
so glad to have found your newsletter this year. thank you, as always, for your honesty and kindness! 💜🖤💛
Aww, thank you so much, SG! That means a lot to me. I'm glad to have found you too.
Thank you for being here and thank you for sharing! Can't wait to read more in 2024.
Aww, thanks so much, Aisling! I really appreciate you.
I absolutely love this post but FORTY POUNDS OF MUSHROOMS? I can only dream of achieving this in my lifetime
Haha it helps that some of the mushrooms we forage are pretty big. A big hen of the woods (maitake) can be 10 pounds on its own (the biggest one we ever found was 22 pounds, we weighed it!)
Thanks so much for reading!
Your honesty and openness is such a powerful gift to the world! We're all on a continual journey of growth, and of learning about ourselves and the world, it's just so many people are unwilling to accept that and want to think they've reached perfection. That's obviously nonsense, and what would be the point of life if we had it all figured out?! Your desire to keep learning and growing is very precious and it will take you to beautiful places. And if my words have helped in any small way to inspire you to keep sharing your story with the world, then I feel very honoured indeed. ❤️
Thanks so much for your kind words of support and encouragement, Allegra! Always learning is definitely the goal.
Sounds like you've had some amazing growth this year, which is to say it's not always painless. But it's still valuable.
Write without regret. Write the wrong thing. Write mistakes loudly. Write, knowing you may have to apologize later anyway. But please keep writing. It's about the journey, not the destination.
Thanks so much, Robin!
That's a great way to reframe it, to know I may need to apologize later but I need to write it anyway. It wouldn't be learning if I wasn't making mistakes.