Rey, as the mother of a trans masc non-binary adult, this broke my heart and at the same time filled me with admiration for your bravery and vulnerability in writing this. My kid is your age. I’m afraid for them but I’m so proud of them. (The mom in me has to say, please don’t read the comments on Huff Post. They tend to get vile.) I hope that our country will not always be this cruel. Sending you a mom hug.
The irony of these wrongheaded bathroom laws: the man who harassed you in the women’s restroom was violating the very law he probably agrees with 🤦🏼♀️.
Cis het men cause more trauma in the world than any demographic, but let’s focus on legislating and policing likely the least harmless people in our communities. My head hurts at how senseless and hurtful this all is. Thank you for sharing your story Rey.
I recall that after North Carolina's HB2 "bathroom bill" inspired other states to do the same, a cis woman was arrested for using the women's room. She was dressed in a skirt and blouse, but her hair was very short b/c she had just donated to Locks of Love.
I wish we could see all public bathrooms go the way of the one in a Seattle restaurant I was in. The opening to the restroom was large. All I could see at first was a row of sinks on the left with people using them. Farther in was a long row of stalls with doors. There were apparent women. There were apparent men. There were probably nonbinary and trans people in there. No one seemed the lest bit ill at ease. It was profoundly refreshing.
Thanks for sharing your story, and thanks for your courage.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. What an awful man!
Congrats on the Huff Post publication too. I had a essay published there last year and though it was destabilizing to suddenly have a bigger audience for my work, I was very proud of it. I hope you're proud too 💕
I'm also looking forward to reading your 'behind the scenes' next week!
Thanks for putting this piece out into the world. It's so important to share these stories. The only time (so far) I was questioned about being in the wrong bathroom was in a rest stop in Pennsylvanian c. 2015, two years before I began transitioning. I was in the bathroom that corresponded to my assigned birth sex and my at-that-time gender marker, but my presentation was masculine. I got asked if I knew I was in the women's room. This is a small example of how the bathroom bills that are being put into law in trans-hating states are only going to increase confusion and harassment, not quell it. How far are the legislators willing to go to make sure we're all using the "right" restroom?
Rey, as the mother of a trans masc non-binary adult, this broke my heart and at the same time filled me with admiration for your bravery and vulnerability in writing this. My kid is your age. I’m afraid for them but I’m so proud of them. (The mom in me has to say, please don’t read the comments on Huff Post. They tend to get vile.) I hope that our country will not always be this cruel. Sending you a mom hug.
Aww, thank you so much, Elizabeth! I appreciate you! It's so nice to hear your love and support for your kid.
The irony of these wrongheaded bathroom laws: the man who harassed you in the women’s restroom was violating the very law he probably agrees with 🤦🏼♀️.
Cis het men cause more trauma in the world than any demographic, but let’s focus on legislating and policing likely the least harmless people in our communities. My head hurts at how senseless and hurtful this all is. Thank you for sharing your story Rey.
I completely agree, Amy - you express this so well. Thank you so much for reading and sharing your perspective and support!
I recall that after North Carolina's HB2 "bathroom bill" inspired other states to do the same, a cis woman was arrested for using the women's room. She was dressed in a skirt and blouse, but her hair was very short b/c she had just donated to Locks of Love.
I wish we could see all public bathrooms go the way of the one in a Seattle restaurant I was in. The opening to the restroom was large. All I could see at first was a row of sinks on the left with people using them. Farther in was a long row of stalls with doors. There were apparent women. There were apparent men. There were probably nonbinary and trans people in there. No one seemed the lest bit ill at ease. It was profoundly refreshing.
Thanks for sharing your story, and thanks for your courage.
Thanks so much for reading and for your comment, Robin! I also like well-designed all gender bathrooms as an idea.
Rey, those two inch locks look fabulous! Thank you for sharing your story(ies).
Thanks so much, Amy! Great to hear from you 🧡
I'm so sorry this happened to you. What an awful man!
Congrats on the Huff Post publication too. I had a essay published there last year and though it was destabilizing to suddenly have a bigger audience for my work, I was very proud of it. I hope you're proud too 💕
I'm also looking forward to reading your 'behind the scenes' next week!
Thank you so much, Clare! I really appreciate you.
💕💕
Rey, I'm sorry you went through this. Thanks for having the courage to tell your story to a wider audience.
Thank you so much! I appreciate you.
Thanks for putting this piece out into the world. It's so important to share these stories. The only time (so far) I was questioned about being in the wrong bathroom was in a rest stop in Pennsylvanian c. 2015, two years before I began transitioning. I was in the bathroom that corresponded to my assigned birth sex and my at-that-time gender marker, but my presentation was masculine. I got asked if I knew I was in the women's room. This is a small example of how the bathroom bills that are being put into law in trans-hating states are only going to increase confusion and harassment, not quell it. How far are the legislators willing to go to make sure we're all using the "right" restroom?