This was in Boston, in the late 1960s. The Boston Strangler was fresh on everyone's minds.
Nonetheless, a bunch of us college kids spontaneously decided to hitchhike on Huntington Avenue to a party one late Friday afternoon. A guy picked us up, he said, so that nobody else would. He scolded us for stupidly risking our lives, but he brought us to our party destination safely.
Two years later, my date's car ran out of gas around 11:30 pm Saturday night. There were no cell phones in those days. We were walking around in the middle of nowhere and feared for our safety.
A creepy looking stranger pulled over, heard our plight, and offered us a ride to get gas. We squeezed into his creepy front seat. I kept my hand on the door handle for a quick escape if needed. My date, between us, kept his hand on the pocket knife in his jacket, just in case.
As we got out of the creepy stranger's car, he told us he was more scared than we were. But because we reminded him of his small children who might be in trouble some day, he took a chance on us. His weird small eyes stared at me nervously, and he whispered to me: If I found his daughter lost in the street ten years from now, would I please help her out?
Safe travels! Love reading your stories! Fabulous photos! Enjoy your trip!
Wow, great stories, thank you for sharing! I enjoyed hearing a little about your time in Boston. That's a creepy situation to be sure but I'm glad it worked out safely in the end. That's a good point that it's somewhat safer now with cell phones to be able to make an emergency call or even just know where you are on a map. Big difference. Thanks again for sharing, really loved your stories!
It sounds like a great visit. Thanks for describing it for us. True, but I am not proud of it: when I read the title question, my first thought was "Hell No!" Years ago, when I lived in LA, I offered a ride to a young man I didn't know -- I don't remember the circumstances, or why I felt compelled to offer him a ride. What I remember was second-guessing myself the entire time, and despite his kind and gracious demeanor, I felt relieved when we got where he needed to go, and he got out of my car. I felt good about having extended the kindness, at the same time I felt foolish and careless for offering a total stranger a ride. It makes me sad, knowing that I have yet to unlearn my unconscious assumptions that danger and conflict are more likely than kindness and cooperation, and what's even sadder is that I am not odd in this way; it is the prevalent assumption in our culture. That sadness coexists with the knowledge that it is entirely reasonable for many people (including myself) to err on the side of mistrust. <sigh>
Thanks for sharing this story, LC! I think it's completely fair to not trust people we don't know, and it is the assumption in our culture as you said. It sounds to me like you are/were taking care of yourself, which can be even more important than putting oneself out there to have an adventure with a stranger.
My post for next week is going to be about the Japanese word yoyuu meaning something like having extra room, breathing space, etc. Maybe that could be tied into the idea of trusting a stranger, something you can only do comfortably if you have that space in your life or a backup plan if something goes a little wrong.
I hitchhiked in Japan! With my then girlfriend. Families picked us up. Among other people. And they all took responsibility for getting us exactly where we were going. It was kind of miraculous.
Rey, I really enjoy this kind of story, the meandering journey of trusting a semi-translated conversation. I'm relieved it turned out well and I hope this is the type of memory you hold onto for a long time.
And also thanks for the shout of support! I'm loving all the joy around small right now.
My mother did not trust anyone (and I mean ANYONE) due to mental illness, and as a result she had a very empty and lonely existence.
That and because luckily I inherited my father’s genes for this, I usually assume good intentions from people and that gives a very nice life even though you are sometimes disappointed, this is not often and still worth it (if your life doesn’t depend on it). Just getting in with a stranger depends, an older lady is fine (if she can drive a bit 😉 ), the rest I don't know, I'm also not naive and know that not everyone has your best interests at heart....
It really is a difficult balance between giving others' intentions the benefit of the doubt and protecting yourself.
Hi Rey,
Would I get into a car with a stranger? No!!
Did I ever? Yes, twice.
This was in Boston, in the late 1960s. The Boston Strangler was fresh on everyone's minds.
Nonetheless, a bunch of us college kids spontaneously decided to hitchhike on Huntington Avenue to a party one late Friday afternoon. A guy picked us up, he said, so that nobody else would. He scolded us for stupidly risking our lives, but he brought us to our party destination safely.
Two years later, my date's car ran out of gas around 11:30 pm Saturday night. There were no cell phones in those days. We were walking around in the middle of nowhere and feared for our safety.
A creepy looking stranger pulled over, heard our plight, and offered us a ride to get gas. We squeezed into his creepy front seat. I kept my hand on the door handle for a quick escape if needed. My date, between us, kept his hand on the pocket knife in his jacket, just in case.
As we got out of the creepy stranger's car, he told us he was more scared than we were. But because we reminded him of his small children who might be in trouble some day, he took a chance on us. His weird small eyes stared at me nervously, and he whispered to me: If I found his daughter lost in the street ten years from now, would I please help her out?
Safe travels! Love reading your stories! Fabulous photos! Enjoy your trip!
Wow, great stories, thank you for sharing! I enjoyed hearing a little about your time in Boston. That's a creepy situation to be sure but I'm glad it worked out safely in the end. That's a good point that it's somewhat safer now with cell phones to be able to make an emergency call or even just know where you are on a map. Big difference. Thanks again for sharing, really loved your stories!
It sounds like a great visit. Thanks for describing it for us. True, but I am not proud of it: when I read the title question, my first thought was "Hell No!" Years ago, when I lived in LA, I offered a ride to a young man I didn't know -- I don't remember the circumstances, or why I felt compelled to offer him a ride. What I remember was second-guessing myself the entire time, and despite his kind and gracious demeanor, I felt relieved when we got where he needed to go, and he got out of my car. I felt good about having extended the kindness, at the same time I felt foolish and careless for offering a total stranger a ride. It makes me sad, knowing that I have yet to unlearn my unconscious assumptions that danger and conflict are more likely than kindness and cooperation, and what's even sadder is that I am not odd in this way; it is the prevalent assumption in our culture. That sadness coexists with the knowledge that it is entirely reasonable for many people (including myself) to err on the side of mistrust. <sigh>
Thanks for sharing this story, LC! I think it's completely fair to not trust people we don't know, and it is the assumption in our culture as you said. It sounds to me like you are/were taking care of yourself, which can be even more important than putting oneself out there to have an adventure with a stranger.
My post for next week is going to be about the Japanese word yoyuu meaning something like having extra room, breathing space, etc. Maybe that could be tied into the idea of trusting a stranger, something you can only do comfortably if you have that space in your life or a backup plan if something goes a little wrong.
Thanks again for sharing!
I really like that yoyuu concept. I'm looking forward to reading your thoughts on it. 💚
I hitchhiked in Japan! With my then girlfriend. Families picked us up. Among other people. And they all took responsibility for getting us exactly where we were going. It was kind of miraculous.
Wow, that's amazing! It does feel miraculous when it works out. Thanks for sharing, Skye!
Love reading about Japan and your dojo/sensei!
Yay! I'm glad. Thanks so much!
Rey, I really enjoy this kind of story, the meandering journey of trusting a semi-translated conversation. I'm relieved it turned out well and I hope this is the type of memory you hold onto for a long time.
And also thanks for the shout of support! I'm loving all the joy around small right now.
Thanks, Robin! I'm glad you enjoyed the story. Thanks again for your work to share small+worthy publications with everyone!
Enjoy your time in Japan and at Sensei’s classes. Thanks for sharing your experience.
Thanks very much, Donn!
What a wonderful story, thank you.
My mother did not trust anyone (and I mean ANYONE) due to mental illness, and as a result she had a very empty and lonely existence.
That and because luckily I inherited my father’s genes for this, I usually assume good intentions from people and that gives a very nice life even though you are sometimes disappointed, this is not often and still worth it (if your life doesn’t depend on it). Just getting in with a stranger depends, an older lady is fine (if she can drive a bit 😉 ), the rest I don't know, I'm also not naive and know that not everyone has your best interests at heart....
It really is a difficult balance between giving others' intentions the benefit of the doubt and protecting yourself.
There is a really nice book about the good in people : https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Humankind:_A_Hopeful_History
This is really recommended, a wonderful book about the good side of humanity by a really clever Dutch guy. ☺️💙